Most were covering their ears. I was also spraying husband bulge cream-gurt all over the windshield like a fucking maniac so it was hard to see and I may have hit a dog or a horse (I CAN'T REMEMBER BECAUSE I WAS ON METH/SEMEN). Now if you've never been to Barrow, it's a small place, not much there. That stupid vampire movie takes place there with Josh Bartlet or whatever his name is.
So at this point I DECIDED I AM IN-FACT a faggot clown.
God DAMNIT. So I take my time with a weird little turnout with my face in the sewer and I am screaming into a puddle, which amounts to a burble of terrifying burp language. Anyway as the SUN set for the last time for 30 days, I wrested my crooked, shrunken glob cone from it's cave and began yanking at it with such force that bits of skin and muscle were coming off in my curled claws and I was really getting into it. I siphoned the gas from the bronco and spit it all in one unholy blast over the Eddie Bauer upholstry within and lit a match. You could see the blaze for miles. I know because I began walking through the snow back toward Barrow, a tire iron in my hand; barefoot; puking bile and horse manure; and gently humming "My nearer god to thee" with one broken ankle and a .45 pistol in the other hand. You see i HAD vengeance on my breath, in my scabbed, scabies-filled heart. You morons don't understand that the War in Heaven isn't a one time happening.
You don't understand that it wasn't a one time thing you read about with your dad and grandma as they beefed your horned rat porp. Naw nigga, when I was hurled to earth by the big bitch himself, it was eternity you fuck. There are some ratty shit pages out there somewhere explaining this, when I was a bit more eloquent FUCK YOU. yEAH MICHael and his army advanced on us and it looked like flower petals in a neon oblivion of nothing. I remember advancing with my pike of eternity, screaming with honor and hatred mixed together in a blend of pink and greens oh it was a sight to see. But it was decreed by God to never end. So it continues still. Anyway, had a FLASHBACK, sorry. HEading into Barrow I relived that shit. And I got to bonking on the nuggets and peep turd real hard. It was disgusting. I remember vomiting just because I looked down and saw what i was doing. When I entered Barrow it was sunset.
This is November 28, 2014.
BRRRR!! Fuck you it was colder than a dirty whore inside of a Volkswagon frozen inside of a toooon monkey. My head was buzzinf k= MY HEAD was buzzing like a helicopter inside of a whore's vagina. My chim milk was spilling onto the new snow like oil and I kept hollering, "SHOW ME THE MONEY" as I limped down the looming street. In an instant, I was transported into a hallway among one of the many houses along cunningham street and I attacked the first, lowly soul I could find. She was an older woman, maybe 200 years old, and I shouted "ARE YOU SPRY BITCH" but my balls hurt and I fell before her, sipping bleach and snorting some ocycotin (it may have been dried horse semen) and I again exploded from my NASDAQ hose. Yuck. She squealed and scurried from me. But I called after her, "HEY LET'S MAKE THIS REAL!" My pants were long gone and I was bleedling from my hose and my lips and I looked like a melted dog shit.
Don't juge me from this encounter alone, but I caught up to the old wench and bit her vagina off and chewed it like bubble gum as she lay dying in the snow. i HOWELED to the skies with an upsidown boner that resembled a makeshift fart cloud and it was all right with me. I clambered into the city hall and screamed something about urine before i found myself in handcuffs and shoved beneath a bench. i MUST've passed out because I woke to a sobering belt of gas from me own anus and my god it melted paint off the walls. I danced around for a hot second screaming, "I AM KEVIN FROM HOME ALONE 2 I AM KEVON FROM HOMO ALONG ROO!!" and semen was spewing from my dolphin sprayhole like a fucking cannon. "OH MY!" I screamed and it punched a hole in the fucking concrete.
Well that was enough, I began crying like a little boy. "FAGGOT!" i screamed through my tears. iN Time I scurried over the town and at most of the occupants with a nasty cry for help. NO one listens to me though. And as I raped, and as I pillaged, more went missing and more were killed. My dad was happy. And God was happy - that runt. WE may have lost the war, but IDGAF. I SHIT MYSELF SO MANYTIMES.
Do you know what the sound of a squeezed out pecker makes when you stomp on it in the freshly fallen snow?